In the sixties, one of the old monks used to visit St. George church in Sporting, Alexandria. He used to attend the entire Liturgy sitting on the floor with his hands on his face crying bitterly. One of the youth noticed him and one day he drove him to his relatives and there the young man insisted to know what was behind all these tears.
The old monk said, “I never remember that from my youth I had any relation with any woman nor I had any wrong passion. I loved purity and enjoyed chastity. I joined a monastery and lived in real happiness. As I got sick, they insisted that I had to go to the hospital. There a nurse took care of me as her father, but as her care increased I had some impure thoughts. I insisted on leaving the hospital and since then I’m always crying over my weakness. I put my sin ever before me for not to fall.”
The young man told him, “These are only thoughts that occurred many years ago. Why are all these tears?”
“My impure thoughts hurt Him. He who loved me and still loves me, so how shouldn’t I cry? My eternity is very precious. I am scared of losing my glory in God.”
“Do your tears destroy your peace?”
“My tears fill me with happiness and peace and give me hope in my Savior who prepared for me a place in His Father’s bosom.”
God! Give me pure tears.
Mix the tears of repentance with those of happiness.
I remember my sins and weaknesses ever,
And I always remember Your great love.
Your Holy Spirit blames me for my sins.
Your Holy Spirit gives me happiness and peace.
Make my heart happy with the honest tears of repentance.
Bless me my Son!